I had a foundation reading

and I am mutated. yet again.

Kevin Laminto

I’ve had several human design readings and sessions over the years. Not that many though, if you were to compare it respectively.

I had one in November of 2019.

I had another in May of 2021.

I got one more in December of 2021.

And now I had one in October of 2023.

I booked this reading over a year ago, as this person was literally booked out twelve months in advance. I was in a very different place (metaphorically, literally) a year ago. I remember counting down the months in anticipation — six months to go, five months to go…

And then the date was rapidly approaching, and I was unsure whether I wanted to go through with it all. Honestly, I was about 50/50 with cancelling the session.

As many of you would know, I have been in my challenging-human-design-era for the last six months or more. This has been a deeply healing time for me to doubt the assumptions and beliefs I adopted without verifying whether they were legitimately true for me and my own experience.

I had booked this foundation reading with a hardcore analyst who has somewhat of a controversial reputation. They have been in their experiment for over 10 years. Online, they come across as very cold. Brutal almost, with their cut-throat comments on the formality of strategy and authority.

So I was hesitant to have this foundation reading as I was scared I was going to be conditioned away from my own integration of human design. I also was unsure whether I truly needed another reading — I have read and listened to so many lectures over the years, there’s genuinely not much left I haven’t absorbed (what has been leaked on the internet at least, plus what I have purchased myself).

But alas, I had no clarity on whether to cancel as the day came closer, so I decided to go into the experience with openness and curiosity. I mean, the worst that could happen is it turns out terrible. Or it could potentially be excellent.  

Shockingly, to my mind, who was adamant I’d likely get nothing out of it — it turned out to be the latter. It exceeded my expectations.

It was the most in depth, logically detailed analysis I have ever had.

A lot of the information I already knew. But something about having your chart read to you in that level of detail, where no stone was left unturned — they even went through my dream rave for heaven’s sake — was deeply impactful and mutative.

I was reminded of who I am. I was reminded that hey, you’re not fucking delusional. You’re just in your experiment. And relatively speaking, there’s not that many people out there who are in a radical process of surrender. I mean, how many examples do you have of that? And on top of it, how many examples do you have of Projectors? Of non-sacral beings who are not overdriven and overworked to the point of exhaustion?

I was also reminded of my mind’s bullshit stories. Of my conditioning receptors — i.e., the other end of my hanging gates — and how much they can suck me in (hello hanging 36 and my obsession with progress and change). I saw the ways that conditioning — particularly from other people, my family, friends — can so easily pull me back into the mind’s trip, the “I’m in control of everything in my life and I have to make it happen or else I won’t survive” loop.

That is the program humanity is running on. To break away from that, to trust strategy and authority, to trust the body over the mind, is not a walk in the park. At every possible point you turn to, there is something or someone trying to pull you away. Unconsciously of course — it’s not anyone’s fault or intention.

Being four years into my experiment, I had some chuff thinking that I already knew this. Why get a foundation reading when you are already so deep yourself in your own experiment? Did I really need to know anything more?

But I think being several years into my experiment, where I do understand the language, where I’ve had time to see for myself if this works, I could actually take everything they said in. It probably would have been absolute gibberish to me four years ago.

I felt blasted with the density of the reading.

Blasted in a way that feels like another mini shattering.

Being mutated by this information, yet again.  

Every time I think I’m done here and there’s nothing more to learn from this system — or from my own experiment, about myself — boy, do I get jolted back out of my mind’s slumber.

The cringey truth is, the last several months I have been super into trying to “build my business” again.

And I can see clearly, all the ways my mind is still trying to push the river. All the ways I am still trying. Full stop.

The mind wants you to try very very hard. It wants you to compete in this world for top dog. It wants you to get out there, make shit happen, cross off your to-do list, hustle, prove your worth, achieve your “dreams”, be likeable, be a well-respected person, be a functioning member of society, and do it all in record time.

This is the trap. This is the distraction. This is the stuff your mind has been sold from the very moment you were pushed out the womb.  This is the conditioning melting pot we’ve been drenched in and are continually drenched in as soon as you walk out the door.

Oh, to live a differentiated life. To be pulled along a path that does not make any logical sense. It is not easy — it is not easy for the mind, at least. It does not trust that life is meant to come to you. How could it? you may ask. I don’t have time to wait! It rationalises with you.

All of these micro ways my mind still tries to hold on. It’s ironic because my life is 90% easier than it was four years ago. Strategy and authority corrects the body and the body is the life. But the mind… well, it doesn’t mean your mind likes any of it. It doesn’t mean your mind has surrendered, even if your body has.

The mind is a passenger. The mind is a freaking passenger. Doesn’t matter how many times I have heard it, I need to hear it again. It cannot know what is good for the body or the life. It cannot know what will unfold living in a state of surrender. The body has no intellectual understanding of what's going on. The mind freaks out because it thinks it does.

So I’m back to waiting. The rich beautiful state of waiting. That doesn’t mean nothing is happening or I have no agency as a Projector. It is one of the most empowered places to be — to be oneself in the world without succumbing to the pressures of thinking I need to be somebody else. Without trying to wear a costume or a hat that doesn’t fit me or belong to me.  

When the mind is distorted it cannot see. When the mind is concerned with figuring everything out, it is back in the rat race, blinded by conditioning.

This foundation reading came at the perfect time. It came at a time I didn’t even think I needed it, which is probably why it hit so deep.  

It proved to me why I fell in love with human design in the first place.

It has reminded me of how valuable this system is in the power to transform someone’s life and their consciousness. The way it can pierce through layer after layer of the mind’s delusions.

You won’t find it in Facebook groups, on Reddit threads, or on some IG Influencer’s page.

You find it within yourself.

You find it in your own journey of deconditioning.

You find it in your own personal relationship to this system.

How it dances and moves within your cells.

How your life changes in ways you could never expect.

It really is pure magic.

Sometimes, I just need to be reminded of it.

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